Saturday, June 27, 2009

My Beautiful Violin

I am tired as I write this. I've been extremely exhausted pretty much every day for the past while. Mid-April I was in a lot of pain and we found another ovarian cyst. 10 years ago I had a 12 cm cyst surgically removed. This one is around 6 cm - so about 1/2 the size. It is still there and the same size which now makes it persistent and abnormal, and by the OBGYN's opinion needs to come out.
I have surgery scheduled for Monday morning in St George. I've always been pretty sensitive when it comes to fertility issues. I would really like to have a large family with lots of kids. I really, really, really enjoy being a mom. Our girls bring me the greatest joy :)
I look at our girls as the biggest blessing! I love modern medicine too. If I had been born at another time in history, I don't know if I would have been able to have kids with the cysts - rupturing or twisting is a possibility when they get so big.
It's hard for me to write about this. The hardest thing would be to not be able to have kids. Next hardest would be to only be able to have 1. We have 2 sweet, darling girls, so I feel I have much to be thankful for. If it was up to me, I would choose to have 6+ kids. I feel selfish as I write this as I know family and friends that aren't able to have kids. Children are a huge part of the gospel, and we desire to raise them in righteousness and love - with a huge amount of FUN too!
Hopefully removing this cyst also helps me with my energy.
I have ALWAYS wanted to play the violin. Growing up, I started the piano at age 7. I really enjoy being able to play the piano, and even though I wanted to play the violin, I never told anyone because if I had to choose, I would choose the piano as my instrument of choice.
I finally decided to take lessons and make my dreams a reality :)
I think we need to take some time to enjoy the things that really make us smile and live.
I feel alive when I play the violin, and I don't feel tired at all when I play. I can only do it when the girls are taking naps (which seldom happens that they are both down for naps at the same time) or after they are asleep for the night. There are so many other things that cry out to be done in that quiet time with 2 hands - but I've really had such a fun time playing and pretending I'm a violinist :)
I wanted to find a good teacher - and I ran into Linda Deluca's husband at a yard sale at their home. She was inside the house teaching a violin lesson and I mentioned to him that I've always wanted to learn and was she taking on new students? After telling people I would start with her as my teacher, I have heard some amazing things about her. She has a Masters from Julliard in violin and she used to play for the Dixie Chicks. She has a fun personality too.
The person you are today and the person you are in 5 years will differ by the people you associate with and the books that you read. I'm glad I made this connection.
Here's to Enjoying the Journey and Finding the Courage to Follow Your Dreams!

1 comment:

  1. Wow! Dear girl, That is wonderful. I'm so excited to hear you play when you are ready to share!!! I was thinking about you today!! Praying for you. Hope all went well! Let me know... Love ya!